dreamage

i was at my mom's house in nashville, and there was a party happening. i was very excited, because kenny was going to be there, and i was psyched to meet him. of course in the dream he turned out to be someone else entirely who i guess somehow represented what kenny represents to me. he was quite tall and actually rather like pfloide, and he had some weird thing about his right eye, like some scarring or something. josh was also there, as well as various other people from here. in the dream, josh and "kenny" (whose name was actually something else, maybe eric?) were romantically involved. a number of people were hanging out on the back deck, except it was inside, and there was this whole slew of dvds that i was looking through. they included quite a bit of porn. "kenny" had a dvd of a movie that i hadn't seen yet that was one of his favourites and that several other people had also told me i had to see. i don't remember what the name of it was or if it actually exists. probably not. i was out there talking to him for awhile, then later we were all at dinner somewhere. it was a nice foofy restaurant, and the bill ended up being over $500. i had no cash except for a $50 bill that geoff had given me, so i was going to put it on my credit card. (i had another dream a few days ago in which i had no cash except money given to me by geoff, that time in the form of a $100 bill and a $150 bill. not sure what that's about.)

we were in a caravan heading back to the house from dinner, and everybody had their stuff with them in the vehicles. i was riding in one suv that geoff was driving, and i had my backpack with me, but my big bag was in another suv. i realised that we were not going the right way, and i asked where the hell we were and who was giving directions, and it turned out that nobody was, and geoff was just driving not knowing where he was going. we drove past a big estate that was apparently a microbrewery, then down the other side of a mountain, and when we got to the bottom we found that the road was flooded. we were ok in the suvs for awhile, but then there was a long stretch of road that was in a canyon that was totally flooded up to the roof except for a strip on the left that was only about knee high. we stopped the vehicles and got out and took all the stuff out of them. i was really afraid of losing stuff in the water, because the current was rather strong. (can i stop having dreams about water and losing stuff? how about some other themes once in a while?) so everybody was milling around trying to figure out what to do, and they decided to start walking somewhere, but i was like what the hell are you doing?! and convinced them to go back to the vehicles and the stuff, and showed them that the suvs could drive along the left where the water wasn't as deep. so everything got loaded back into the suvs and we proceeded on our way. i was paranoid about my bag and not having it with me and not knowing if it was safe in the other suv.

this part i'm not certain where it came in the chronology. i've just remembered it after getting almost to the end, and this seems the most likely place to insert it. maybe. anyway, we were on foot and trying to get down this mountain (again?), and we came to a place where there were these beds of long grasses lying down on these sort of pedestals of earth with gaps in between them, and on one side there was a sheer drop down the side of the mountain, and on the other there was a big open level area sort of inside the mountain, but in between there was a great chasm going deep into the earth. we had to go down on these grassy pedestals to get to the level area, and i went the wrong way down one to the right when i should 've gone to the left, so that i couldn't get across the big chasm and had to climb back up. i was really afraid and was crying and geoff was trying to calm me down. finally we all made it and we went inside where it was the inside of a building that was some sort of doctor's office. geoff was going to wait to see a doctor for some reason about which i am unclear, but it was taking too long, so we ended up just leaving.

later we stopped at a chain restaurant. it was really big and convoluted and we were seated way in the back somewhere. it was a long tall table with a bench along one side and stools on the other. i was sitting on the bench and having fun sliding back and forth on it. in front of this table were some booths that were also tall. there were a couple of employees who were trying to eat, but they could only do so while sitting at one of the tables, but they couldn't take up the space if there were customers who needed it, so they kept getting seated by our waitress and start to try to eat, but then they would disappear, only to reappear and be seated again later. there were never any customers who needed the table though. eventually we were trying to leave the restaurant and had a terrible time trying to find our way out, kept finding our way blocked, had to go around areas where the tables were too close together to get through. finally we made it out a door that was an unmarked exit from one of the side wings in the front.

then there was this playground sort of thing where we were supposed to play a game. it was set up to be like a video game somehow, and we had to go through these various things in order. the first one was a set of four circles that were hung that you had to crouch down and push aside to get past them, but i was too lazy and just walked around it and said to pretend i did it. the next thing was this ramp that went down into the ground in this structure, and you slid a chair down it, then when the chair hit the end of the ramp inside, these rocks or ball bearings or something would fall down into it, then there was some mechanism to shoot them out the other end of the structure. they were somehow contained though, so that when you slid the chair down again, they would fall down again.

then things started to get pretty weird and i don't remember this part very well. we were all walking, trying to get somewhere, and i was walking with geoff and trying to explain to him about the great conversations i'd had at the party, and how on the meds i was feeling good about myself and my ability to connect with people. the setting became something out of some (as far as i know nonexistent) fantasy book, and i don't know why, but i had to kill this woman who i think was not human, and in the process part of one of her hands turned to charcoal. i was trying to hide this from geoff for some reason, and let him see only the rest of the body. then some other stuff happened that i don't remember, and, now here's the really weird part, i ended up needing to set up the dead woman and three of her dead friends as a reanimated acapella group. too bad i can't remember what they were singing. it was pretty good. geoff was really angry with me for killing the woman, and i was trying to convince him that it had to be done, that she deserved it and was evil or something, but i don't think i was making much headway. he was sure that it must not have been necessary to kill anyone.

so yeah, um, my subconscious is weird.